Hectic
Life becomes harder. Does anyone ever tell you the truth of life? How much you need to spend in your daily until you unable to treat yourself. What taxes you must cover when you have a job. Money is everything but money cant buy happiness. What if my happiness from a price tag then im poor. I really am. My soul isn't there anymore. Life is getting insatiable and nonsense, clamor me to have a depression and emptiness. I seek for GOD, I seek for peace. However, I fall. I hurt. I am alone. College's life is completely different from high school. I have no close friends (and i neglect to find one heh). Everyone such a selfish, stubborn, cruel and miserable. Clever High IQ students everywhere and I am such a potato girl with potato mind. I dont belong there. I DONT BELONG ANYWHERE EITHER. It keeps toring me when all my carrymarks are miserable and severe while others classmates are completely perform and succeed. Haih. I shouldnt believe my successes are on a slip of paper, its on Allah's WILL. All I have to do is not giving up and moving on. Im afraid, scared, tempest, hurt with the future and tremendous of expectations on me. In high school, the feelings weren't feeling real, it felt like I was with my friends together getting through the journey and facing obstacles. They always there to cheer me up and that is why until now, it's hard for me myself to move on from high school's life to unexplained college's life. I love them(my classmates and best friends so bad) I really do. I never think about my life would be such an empty can when the journey was over.
Aren't you grateful myself? I am, I really grateful for getting an oppurtunity to further my study in college. FOR EVERY SMALL FREAKING THING. Yet, my life still remain inadequate. I am still observing, searching something to fulfill the emptiness that deep in my heart. When you are getting older, you will perceive your life aren't the same like it used to be before. You meet vary types of people. No more decent and magnanimous society. Even some people experienced that their own family cheat,defeat and tore one another down ward for their own sake. Although lives can be such miserable, hectic and depressing, try to look on a bright side. Run towards it. Achieve it. It is your aim, purpose of life and goals. Expectations may burden you, but you yourself can STOP them from haunt you. Don't let introspective killed you inside. Face it and overcome it. You can do this ! You are viable, born to be ready to do this. GOOD LUCK!
Sayonara.
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